Working But Not Writing

I’ve done a lot of working lately.  Mostly it’s been putting together a student resource guide for 1 Dead in Attic (of which I gave a presentation in a professional development session this past Thursday) and also administering a campus-wide student literary contest.  I guess I do a good job doing these two things because my dean up and HUGGED me in the office this past afternoon, just as I was leaving for home.

It’s a big warm-and-fuzzy to my self-esteem, as often I fear that I’m doing a little more than a half-ass job at my work.  Constantly being behind on grading likely contributes to this.

Ah, woopty-effing-do!  :p

I have been working working working… but not writing.  If it weren’t for this blog, I’d likely never do any writing — which saddens me a bit.

Okay, it saddens me a lot more than “a bit”, but I don’t have that kind of time to wallow in “I wish” and “if only if”.  I wouldn’t even be blogging about it, if it weren’t for the fact that there’s a self-published book of poems and short stories, floating out there in Publication Land, and someone — some complete stranger — found it on the web.

And he or she bought it.

This book was cobbled together from poems and short stories of mine, just gathering dust on my hard drive, and one day over Christmas 2006, I decided, “SCREW IT, PUBLISHERS” and got it in book form, using Lulu.com.  And once it was done (I even threw in the cost of getting an ISBN, as if what I wrote was worth something to someone), I pretty much neglected it, other than putting a link on my personal website, as well as on this blog’s “Links” page.

So… yeah.  I got that “I’m now published” itch scratched, and I moved on.  Thus, my surprise that someone actually bought it.  Someone who isn’t a friend or family.  Someone I have never met.

And to that someone: THANK YOU.

If I stop and think — which I try not to do these days because my brain still tends to go towards a dark mood that doesn’t help anything — I can still feel that ten-year old kid who wanted to be a rich and famous novelist when she grew up.

28 years later: this’ll do.  🙂

Pax, and good night.

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