Cognitive Dissonance

From my previous post, y’all know that I have these photos, professionally done, of Daniel.  One of them is in a large, beautiful frame, and, after selecting a handful for the photo album here at home, I was all set to send them off to my parents for an early birthday gift (for my dad, born in February)/ very very early birthday gift (for my mom, born in April).

And also, from a previous post, around the last day of Christmas, y’all know that my little sister Wen was expecting — unexpectedly but happily so.

But then… I received a text message Saturday from Wen, who moved in with our parents when her abusive marriage ended.

She lost her baby, near the end of her first trimester.  I told her that if she needed me, I was here.  But right now, all she wants to do is be with her boyfriend so that they can curl up together and grieve.

So I am looking at all of these photos of my beautiful little boy, and I’m trying not to cry.  Three miscarriages my little sister has suffered through, and here is Daniel, smiling up at me.  Three lost babies, and here is Daniel.

Sometimes, life just doesn’t make sense to me.

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About lizardqueen

If single-mothering were a paid job, I'd be rich. However, it doesn't, so I write (which doesn't pay the bills) and teach (which does). I'm overly-educated in the liberal arts, but that doesn't hinder my ability to be pragmatic and realistic. YAY.
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One Response to Cognitive Dissonance

  1. convivialdingo says:

    So sorry for your sister… life hardly makes any sense to me, but so far it gets better 🙂

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