“I Was Just Thinking of You”

Yet another insomnia night; good thing I don’t have to work tomorrow, or else my morning would suck.

As usual, after tossing and turning in bed for two hours, I’m out of bed and away from the bedroom, since past experiences with insomnia, forcing myself to try to sleep, have taught me that it only makes it worse and makes me associate the bedroom with insomnia. So, here it is, 3am, and I’m blogging — not that any sane person is awake, but, hey, what the hell.

The title comes from me calling a friend of mine a week ago, who, at the sound of my voice, laughed and said, “I was just thinking of you and was about to call you to say come on over if you aren’t busy tonight.”

What she said made my day. Hell, it made my *week*. Maybe it’s just me, but “I love you” gets over-used such that it’s turned into an empty phrase: “Love ya,” “LU” etc. Not just to family, spouses, lovers, and perhaps very close friends, but even mere acquaintances or even accidentally (it happened to me a few times — very awkward). Even worse is the “Hey, I love you, BUT –” Then the phrase is a preface to soften the critical blow.

But when a person you love says to you, “I was just thinking of you,” for no obligatory special occasion (like a birthday or anniversary), that’s no accident. That’s real; that person paused in his or her life in order to think of *you* — even briefly. It’s a form of gratitude, a short-hand way of saying, “Thank you for being around, thank you for being you, you’re important to me.”

So, you see, she made my week because, frankly, it had been awhile since I had heard it from anyone. Like “I love you” it’s become to a lot of people an empty phrase.

But not to me.

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About lizardqueen

If single-mothering were a paid job, I'd be rich. However, it doesn't, so I write (which doesn't pay the bills) and teach (which does). I'm overly-educated in the liberal arts, but that doesn't hinder my ability to be pragmatic and realistic. YAY.
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